It’s been a while since I checked in with Balki Bartokomous and asked him to help me make one of my dreams come true, but after wrapping up my first guest appearance on the Nerd Lunch podcast (which certainly qualifies) I was feeling particularly triumphant and wanted to do something to celebrate. The Perfect Strangers game was the first thing that came to mind. Also flying. And collecting stars. Preferably collecting stars while flying.

Since I’ve already achieved my dream–well, multiple dreams really, if we’re counting my scoring a box of Cap’n Crunch’s fabled Christmas Crunch cereal at the grocery store this past weekend–I decided to keep things casual and enter in a silly dream I made up on the spot:

(Not really.)

Evidently to “fart” is not an acceptable dream, so I had to make mine a little more ambitious:

(Seriously. This is not my real dream.)

There we go. I went on to earn a respectable 72%. Not my highest score, but enough for Balki to make my dream come true. But whatever, that’s not why I play this game. The real fun is seeing The Dream Board that puts everyone’s hilarious/terrible dreams on display for all the world to see.

The Dream Board

My favorites from this batch include “eat poop”, “murder Justin Bieber”, and the clear winner, “get 50 amazingly hot porn stars pregnant.” That guy was obviously dreaming big. I’m still a little unclear on how exactly one fucks a pizza, though. Also, I think some people got confused and interpreted “dream” for “things you want to eat right now.”